Coach Crean, The Reds, and Dishonest Hacks

IU's administration appears to have finally done something right. Via the hiring Coach Crean, IU Nation finally has a coach that everybody can get behind, and it only took 18 million dollars to do so. I'm hesitant to comment too much outside of saying that I really like the hire. Frankly, right now there's just too much uncertainty with the team to go much beyond that. Next year will probably be pretty rough, as will the year after that, possibly. However, I have the utmost confidence that Coach Crean can and will succeed at IU, and by succeed I mean meet the expectations of IU fans: Win Big Ten titles, compete for national titles, graduate players, and recruit within the rules set by the NCAA. My top three candidates for the job were Bruce Pearl, Tony Bennett, and Sean Miller. However, I think Coach Crean may be a better hire than any of those in some ways: Pearl is not without controversy, Bennett is still relatively unproven, and Miller had a ridiculously high buyout. Coach Crean is a proven commodity.

Memo to the Reds: The object of the game is to score runs, hopefully more than one's opponent. You appear to have forgotten that, so take this friendly reminder, and hit the goddamn ball. Thanks.


My buddy Ben (or Benny, as I like to call him) is an aspiring sports writer. In my not so humble opinion, he has a lot of talent. Fortunately for us, he recently started his own blog to showcase said talent. If you're a sports fan, I highly recommend a bookmark. The kid's got a natural writing ability, and a bright future ahead of him (hopefully he won't be the Pirates beat writer. That would be a depressing job).


Dear Hillary Clinton and John McCain,
I understand that, as politicians, it's difficult for you to go too terribly long without being dishonest fucks. However, could you at least try to not lie about or misconstrue something that Mr. Obama says for, oh, I don't know, about ten damn seconds? Obama recently said this while out on the campaign trail:

You go into these small towns in Pennsylvania and, like a lot of small towns in the Midwest, the jobs have been gone now for 25 years and nothing’s replaced them. And they fell through the Clinton administration, and the Bush administration, and each successive administration has said that somehow these communities are gonna regenerate and they have not. So it’s not surprising then that they get bitter, they cling to guns or religion or antipathy to people who aren’t like them or anti-immigrant sentiment or anti-trade sentiment as a way to explain their frustrations.

That's one of the most surprisingly honest statements I've ever heard from a politician. Frankly, it by itself makes me think that Obama may be worth the hype. Senator Obama seems to actually understand this country. What a novel idea for a presidential candidate, eh? How did his opponents respond? Well, let's play a little game. Can you tell which one of these comments came from McCain, and which came from Clinton (you know, the lady who is allegedly a member of the same party as Senator Obama)?

“Senator Obama’s remarks are elitist and they are out of touch,” insertcandidatesnameheere told an audience. “They are not reflective of the values and beliefs of Americans. Certainly not the Americans that I know.”

Ugh. Apparently the values and beliefs of all 275 million Americans are quite similar, and able to be reflected or not reflected by one quote. On to response number two:

"It shows an elitism and condescension towards hardworking Americans that is nothing short of breathtaking," said Steve Schmidt, a senior advisor to insertcandidatesnamehere. "It is hard to imagine someone running for president who is more out of touch with average Americans."

Double ugh. For the record, even if that was a true statement (and if you read Obama's comments, you know it's not), I WANT a candidate who is out of touch with average Americans. Average Americans are stupid, stupid people. Average people in general are stupid. Personally, I want somebody better than average running the country. However, I'm not a complete moron, so I can understand why that sentiment isn't shared by the majority of the country.

So, which one belongs to which candidate? The first one belongs to Clinton, the second to a McCain advisor, though it'd be easy to think they both came from Republican strategists. How fucking dishonest can two people be? I used to respect Senator McCain, until he showed his true colors the past two years by selling out to the religious nuts whom he used to deride in order to try and secure their support. I've always loved Bill Clinton, and thought that people hated on Hillary out of sexism for the most part. Turns out, they hate on her because she actually is a dishonest, manipulative, scum of the earth, power hungry, typical politician. Should she somehow win the nomination, I won't be voting this year. I refuse to be a part of putting either of these scumsuckers in office.

Oh, and Senator Bayh, once you get done pleasuring Senator Clinton, go fuck yourself. The fact that you can support her and help her lie to attack a fellow Democrat makes you just as bad as her. I thought you were one of the few above that type of shit. I was wrong. I won't be casting a vote for you from here on out, either. Is it really worth brown nosing such an obviously typical politician (I can think of no greater insult) just for a shot at a cabinet position? Fortunately, I'm fairly certain you won't get the opportunity to get that position, as Obama should still win the nomination, unless you bastards somehow convince the super delegates to go against the will of the people. You will, however, get one thing regardless: The second ever Reggie Sad Face Award!

Congrats, Senator Bayh. By once again reminding me that 99.99999% of all politicians are douchebags of the highest order, and making me feel like a fool for thinking you were different all these years, you're almost a big an asshole as Sampson. Almost.

Eric Gordon

Eric Gordon. I love him. You love him (unless you're an Illinois fan, in which case, nobody cares what you think). He's a sure fire lottery pick, the second leading freshman scorer in the country, the Big Ten Freshman of the Year, and a member of the All Big Ten Team. He is the epitome of calm and collected. He is as selfless as big name players come. So, why on earth would he even consider turning down millions and coming back to IU, a school whose program is undergoing yet another year of turmoil on and off the court?

Reason numero uno: His ball handling skills. Young Mr. Gordon is almost always the best athlete on the court. He can split the defense with the greatest of ease. Well, he can fifty percent of the time. The other half, he bounces the ball off of his foot, and it goes rolling to a person in the wrong colored jersey. If IU fans have one legitimate gripe about Eric, it's his turnovers. Some of his turnovers aren't all his fault. He makes very quick passes, passes that will be caught in the NBA. In college, however, only a few of them are. He gets the turnover on his stat sheet because of the poor hands of his teammates. However, most of his turnovers are the variety described above; he simply bounces the ball off of his foot or makes a bad dribble. If he's doing that against Big Ten caliber defenders, how can he expect to get to the hole against NBA defenders?

Reason Nummer zwei: His shot. I know what you're thinking. "Gordon has unlimited range and is a great shooter." You're right. He does, and is. He hasn't been for the last month, though. Could it be because of his wrist injury? Maybe. Maybe not. Am I grasping at straws, hoping he'll stay another year? Perhaps.

Reason number three: Us. And by 'us,' I mean IU fans. Eric, we love you. In all honesty, me giving reasons why you should stay is beyond selfish. I (and we) should count our lucky stars that you ever came here to begin with. But, c'mon. You know you like it when we chant your name at Assembly Hall. Nobody in the NBA will ever do that for you, I can all but guarantee it. The only player whose name I've ever heard chanted during an NBA game was Reggie Miller. No offense, but you aren't Reggie Miller, and you won't ever be. So, how 'bout you stay one more year, basking in the glory that only IU basketball fans can give? We're the best fans in the country, ask Pat Forde. You give us a couple years of basketball, and we'll give you a lifetime of love. You can't put a price on that. Or at least I hope you can't.

Reason four: The coach. "What?" you may be saying. He came here because of Hewhosahllremainunnamed, why would he stay for an as of yet unnamed coach? Because, that's why. The future coach may be a very good coach. Maybe, if we're lucky, a great coach. Do you think Mr. Gordon can learn a thing or two about basketball from Bruce Pearl? I do. Eric seems like a ridiculously humble kid, so I bet he would say so too. He should stay to see who the future coach is, and if he thinks he can learn from the new coach, should stay for his sophomore season.

In all honesty, there's only one even semi-good reason on this list, and that's the first one. Eric is guaranteed millions of dollars to leave this year, and he'd be crazy not to take it. It'd be selfish of IU fans to ask for him to stay. This season has been a massive disappointment, but it most certainly isn't Eric's fault. He's been all that we could have reasonably expected and more. When an off night still involves twenty points, you're a damn good player. He plays good, at times great, defense, isn't a drama queen, and represents Indiana University incredibly well, far better than his former coach. Even without all the drama involving Coach "I can't put down the damned phone" Sampson, he could have left with the blessing of most of IU nation. When you take into account the coaching situation, all of IU nation should be giving this young man their blessing to head into the NBA. Here's hoping the Pacers get lucky in the lottery.

It's the Most Wonderful Time of the Year...

Fuck Christmas, March is the best time of the year. Spring training, the conference tourneys, Selection Sunday, and finally, the best thing on earth, the NCAA Tournament.

Spring training is a magical thing. No matter how awful your team was the previous year (and being a Reds fan, I've seen some pretty awful teams), not even the most die hard cynic (i.e., me) can avoid being filled with hope. You have young guys trying to make the team, you get your first look at new signees, and it's always fun to see old favorites. I can watch Griffey and Dunn bat and Brandon Phillips play second all day, even if the games are meaningless. This year's especially nice for Reds fans because, for the first time in a while, we have a ton of young talent that will be contributing to the Major League team at some point this season. Jay Bruce is the top prospect in the minors (and will make losing Griffey much easier to take. Well, not for me, but I have a borderline unhealthy love of him), Homer Bailey is still exciting even if he does have control issues, and Johnny Cueto.... Well he very well might end up being the best out of all three. One scout said after watching him this spring that he's our ace. Considering that Aaron Harang is currently our very, very good number one right now and one of the best starters in the NL, that's very high praise. He's being compared to Pedro Martinez. I'm beyond pumped to see him this year. Even if the Reds end up disappointing me yet again this year, they're still always fun to watch. The team is filled with good guys who are fun to root for, even if we do always miss the playoffs. The Pacers could learn a thing or two from that.

On to hoops... I love the conference tournaments. I don't think winning them means anything, unless you're fighting for a bid to the NCAA's, but that's what makes it great. If a team gets hot, they can play their way in, and once you're in anything can happen. It's not without negatives though: Part of me wants the best 65 teams in the tournament, regardless of conference. The automatic bids prevent this happening. No disrespect to the smaller conferences, but with a lot of them, the league champion is nowhere near one of the best 65. Meanwhile bubble teams from bigger conferences who are good enough to possibly make some noise head on to the NIT. There are enough computer polls out now (Sagarin, Pomeroy, RPI) that one can fairly easily identify the best 65 teams without bias. But, it's always fun when one of the smaller teams does pull off an upset or two, so I really can't complain.

All the drama surrounding the IU program has put a damper on things for me. I'm fairly accustomed to this after the Mike Davis era. Once I turned on the tv today, however, and saw Texas Tech and Oklahoma State in a barn burner, none of the shit with Sampson mattered. This is the best few weeks of the year, and I'm still optimistic (foolishly) that IU can possibly win the Big Ten tournament and make some noise in the NCAA's. Anytime you have the two best players in the conference, you have to think there's still a chance to do something special. Hopefully IU and Purdue will get another match up, since the Big Ten (Jim Delaney sucks) decided we didn't need to play each other twice this season. How IU/PU isn't a protected rivalry is beyond me. Historically, no other school has dominated the conference like IU and PU, and with the recent resurgence of PU, it's a disgrace that we didn't play twice in the regular season.

Which brings me to another point, one that I hate to say: Matt Painter deserves a ton of credit and in my not so humble opinion should be national coach of the year. I had no doubt that the recruiting class he brought in was good, but I still assumed (like a lot of people) that anytime you rely on that many freshman, you're going to struggle. I was dead wrong. The way Painter has managed the young guys is amazing. A lot of credit goes to the players too, of course. Robbie Hummel is going to be a star in the Big Ten, and all four of them play like upperclassmen most of the time. And, perhaps most tellingly of the type of players they are, they love to play defense. Purdue fans have good reason to be excited for the next several years. Matt Painter is still a whiny little bitch, just like his buddy Bruce Weber, but unlike Weber, he's actually a helluva coach. Man, that hurts to say... (Bet you never thought you'd hear me say anything that nice about the Boilers, eh Miss Nikki?)

Oh, and congrats to Eric Gordon, DJ White, and Armon Bassett. Eric was Big Ten Freshman of the Year and first team all-conference, DJ was Player of the Year and first team all conference, and my man Armon was named third team all conference (mark my words, assuming he doesn't transfer, he's second team or better next year.) This has been a rough season, but it's nice to see the guys get some well deserved accolades.

One more note, my buddy Dev has joined the blogging community. Give him a look.

Friday Tunes (On Saturday)

1) Down - Blink 182
This is a really good album. Not a bad song on it.

2) What Do You Do For Money Honey - AC/DC
Speaking of really good albums, they don't get much better than Back in Black.

3) The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny - Lemon Demon
Download and listen to this now. If there's an ounce of geek in you, you'll love it.

4) Lights (live) - Journey
I wish Perry was still with the band. Journey's live albums are awesome, they sound like they used to put on a helluva show. Damn ego's always screw everything up with good bands...

5) Godzilla - Blue Oyster Cult
Another Guitar Hero song, though I didn't play it enough or hear it played enough for it to become a cliche and ruined for me.

6) Satisfy My Soul - Bob Marley
Certain artists don't need comment. Marley is one these artists.

7) Elo Kiddies - Cheap Trick
Eh. Not one of my favorite Cheap Trick songs. Not bad by any stretch, I'm just not a huge fan of it.

8) Money for Nothing - Dire Straits
One of the all time great music videos, though the Weird Al parody may be even better. Isn't he due for a new album?

9) Stir it Up - Bob Marley
See above.

10) Is She Really Going Out with Him? - Joe Jackson
What guy hasn't said this to himself before? Awesome Brit New Wave. Jackson worked on Williams Shatner's excellent album "Has Been." He does the signing in the song "Common People," which is probably the best song on the album.

Randomness

1) Do me (and yourself) a favor, and head over to my friend Dev's Myspace page and give his songs a listen. The guy's got talent, which is something that can't be said for most of the people who somehow get radio airtime. Seriously, how the hell do people listen to most of that crap?....

2) IU basketball. Damn you. At least Spring Training is underway, so I can look forward to the Reds disappointing me again. I swear there are times when I think I may be a closet masochist.

3) I really hope that Obama wins Texas and Ohio, if for no other reason so that I can stop hearing about delegates and campaign strategies. I forgot how much I hate election years. Nobody ever talks about anything substantial because he/she doesn't want to piss off potential voters, so all you get are vague soundbites, with the occasional 'He/She isn't playing fair!' One can't really blame the candidates though. Nobody in this country votes based on the issues anyways (abortion and gay marriage don't count as 'issues').

4) Brett Favre retired today (at least for now). Do you think Randy Moss signing back with NE rather than going to GB had anything to do with his decision? Maybe I'm cynical, but I do.

5) It was seventy on Sunday. It's now thirty-five and raining. Hooray Indiana.

6) In what I'm hoping will become a regular feature here (though I can't even post regularly, so that may be a bit much to hope for), Kelvin Sampson is the recipient of the first ever "Reggie Sad Face Award." Sampson garners the award for being a liar and a cheat, and fucking over all of Hoosier Nation, who was too quick to offer a second chance. Lesson learned.

Congrats on once again proving the cynics right, dick.

Friday Tunes

You know the drill. No comment on Sampson yet, though you can probably imagine how I feel. On to the music:

1) Patience - Guns 'n' Roses
I wish Axl weren't out of his mind. These guys could have made a lot of great music for a very long time....

2) Cryin' - Aerosmith
Pretty standard late 80's - early 90's Aerosmith, and I'm perfectly okay with that. Most of my favorite songs by them are from this era.

3) Follow You Down - Gin Blossoms
Hadn't heard this song in years until it was on some 90's compilation infomercial a few months ago. Damn catchy song.

4) Ballroom Blitz - Sweet
Awesome drums, and pretty damn fun to play on Rock Band

5) Foolin' - Def Leppard
I was fortunate enough to catch Leppard and REO Speedwagon at Verizon over the summer, and while I went mainly to see REO, Leppard was beyond impressive. They sounded better than their albums, which considering how much time has gone buy since Pyromania, is really saying something. I can't wait to see them again this summer, if all goes well.

6) I'm Gonna Find Another You - John Mayer
A good friend of mine absolutely loves this album and eventually sent it to me and had me listen to it. I would not consider myself a Mayer fan, but this is a really good album on the whole.

7) What it Takes - Aerosmith
See what I said about the previous Aerosmith song, though I actually like this one quite a bit better.

8) Slide - The Goo Goo Dolls
My favorite song by them

9) Just the Same Way - Journey
This is off the Evolution album, a minor hit if memory serves. I still hear it on some classic rock stations from time to time.

10) Insane in the Membrane - Cypress Hill
They just don't make rap music like they used to....

Belated Tunes

I have plenty of excuses to offer for the lack of posting and forgetting of the tunes blog, but I don't feel like writing them, and odds are you don't feel like reading them. So, here are the tunes, late, and excuse free. The way this works is you put your preferred media player on random/shuffle and list the first ten songs played. I have a lot of film scores and stand up comedy on mine that I usually skip over, but outside of that, no cheating. If Air Supply pops up, then you list it.

1) Every Morning - The Crash Test Dummies
Not my favorite song by the CTD's, but a good song regardless. My eighth grade English teacher got me into the CTD's. If you've seen Dumb and Dumber (and I know you have), you've heard them, and probably liked them. I definitely recommend downloading anything you find by them, especially Peter Pumpkinhead, Afternoons and Coffeespoons, and Ghosts That Haunt Me.

2) Nothing But A Good Time - Poison
The prototypical hair band. Artistically, they may be borderline worthless, but they're fun to listen to. I briefly considered going to see them at Verizon this summer. Tickets were only ten bucks if memory serves, so I probably should have gone.

3) The Power of Love - Huey Lewis and News
Back to the Future. Huey Lewis. I heart the 80's.

4) Adam's Song - Blink 182
This album always takes me back to middle school. I didn't really care for Blink back then, but I've come to appreciate them more and more in recent years. That being said, Christ, this song is depressing.

5) Wouldn't It Be Nice - The Beach Boys
Nothing really needs to be said about the Beach Boys, does it? If you don't like them, there is probably something wrong with you.

6) For the Longest Time - Billy Joel
Acapella + Billy Joel = good stuff

7) Keep on Rockin' Me - The Steve Miller Band
Steve Miller is a plagiarizing prick... But I like his music. One of the great sing along songs.

8) Surrender - Cheap Trick
I love Cheap Trick, but this song kinda wore itself out for me after being on Guitar Hero II. Great song, just needs a break.

9) Smokin' - Boston
Boston is arguably the best album ever made. This is my least favorite song on the album, and still one of my favorite songs ever.

10) New York Groove - Kiss
Not your standard Kiss affair in terms of sound. Great beat and rhythm guitar, and a very catchy chorus with lots of hooks.


I'm not sure when I'll post again. Soon hopefully. I gotta plug a talented friend of mine, get some thoughts up about the Big Ten this season (huge next ten days or so for the Hoosiers), and possibly a thought or two on the campaigns thus far. First though, I have to catch up on my rocks. I've fallen behind a bit in my classes, and the next week will probably be spent in lab trying to catch up.